PIRATES OF [IN] THE KENYAN COAST


PIRATES OF [IN] THE KENYAN COAST
The Somali buccaneers are at it again, of course they have been at it all along. However, this time they have Kenyans in their arms. I always wonder if they speak the language of real pirates. Do they have a cool patch over one eye and a hook in place of the left hand? Are there some who have a single leg and may be cooks for the whole crew? My questions still remain unanswered because none of my friends has ever been captured. The frail looking shadows of men who are always arraigned in Mombasa courts do not portray a picture of a respect worthy pirate. If the famous pirates I have always read of looked like this, I am better off being a landlubber as any reputable captain would call me. Does Somali coast have chests of swag and loot deeply buried by pirates wandering off on the seven seas?
The pirates of horn of Africa have apparently decided to up their game and move to more resourceful Kenyan coast. Questions still line up. Chilean navy because of lack of pirates to fight off went ahead and made sophisticated rescue pods for the trapped miners which is an amazing job. That is something to show off from the training and paychecks they receive. Kenya also has a navy and last time I checked they were recruiting more from all the districts. That is the little we hear of them apart from matching donned in gleaming white uniforms in front of presidential dais during public holidays and most recently, promuligation. If that is a job then I should be paid for pressing snooze button in the mornings. Little scouts and girl guides also do the same with even more enthusiasm.
The navy, it seems, shares a common characteristic with our honorable members of parliament. They all sleep on the job. The Korean ship bearing Kenyan flag was captured on our territorial waters. One wonders where the navy patrol boats were when this happened. How did even the pirates move from Somalia and pitch tent…sorry ship in Kenyan territorial waters?
Kenyans are openly stingy and proud of it. I have a feeling the pirates captured the wrong target. They will soon start demanding ransom which automatically contains six or more figures. This will just get government officials blabbering and government spokesman issuing a statement. I can already feel one saying that the I.D.Ps are still on the camps and the money rather than be wasted on few souls who are outside the country, it should be channeled there. A statement from ministry of finance will declare that the government has no money while another cleaver chap adds that pirates and their ransoms were never included in the budget. Time will be dragging on and the pirates will be have already grown impatient with threats of tossing the Kenyans overboard to Davy Jones locker.
The relatives will protest and will even camp outside prime minister’s office and seek audience with him which he will respond promptly. I wonder why protestors and complainers don’t trust baba jimmy. Has he grown too old that he can barely understand what is going on or he simply does not care? Luckily for them, the Kenyan seafarers had Chinese and Korean companions with them. Their governments might decide to pay the ransom. The flipside is when they decide Kenya should shoulder her own burden, a serious word will be sent to the buccaneers. They will have a choice of freeing the Kenyans and continue with their captures pollution free. The second choice will be harder. Waste their precious bullets killing the Kenyans and energies throwing them in to open sea, then polluting their coast with human bodies. The relatives will simply resort to praying that the pirates go with the first choice because this is Kenya. You can’t waste all that money on few individuals who have no significance, it is better in an m.ps belly!

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